Relationships

Fireworks.

It’s no surprise that I’ve been on a countless number of dates. Mostly bad ones, but I’ll be honest with you, I would go on those bad dates again. Going on bad dates has taught me what I liked, what I didn’t and most importantly, what I was looking for in a partner in crime.
It’s also no surprise that I’m in an age where internet dating is a thing. But have you ever go on an awful date and you know instantly it isn’t going to go anywhere? However, you don’t want to come off as a bitch because you realized this in the first 5 mins?

I’ve been there MANY a times.

I had a Facebook friend post this and it showed up on my feed. I instantly replied.

Ugh. Awful date. His pictures made him seem so much more attractive. Now I have to let him down somehow.

I totally get that a picture doesn’t do a person justice, or they only post they only post one type of photo. I also understand that if you aren’t attracted to them, then why waste your time and their time? I feel you need sparks to make some fireworks.This was my response

“I’ll be honest with you, I feel like we aren’t going to work. I don’t feel a spark and I don’t want to waste your time and lead you on. Okay, thanks Bye”.

This was my go to -holy-crap-need-to-run-away-now-but-don’t-want-to-hurt-your-feelings- exit speech.

Yes I had an exit speech. I went on a few dates with guys where it should have ended after the first date, but they seem to be enjoying themselves and I didn’t want to be mean or rude. But by doing that I was leading them on in hopes that these dates would become something. I also was wasting their time, not to mention mine.

On a date where you know it’s not going to go anywhere for you? Be honest with them. I’ll be cliché here, Honesty is the best policy. If they feel like you are being a rude, mean or a bitch because of it, well then great. You dodged a bullet there.
For me dating was awesome (bad dates and all) because I got to understand what I wanted, needed and deserved: Respect.

If you aren’t enjoying yourself on a date, then how can you enjoy a relationship with them? This is a great question, dates are supposed to be fun and you are supposed to enjoy yourself. If by the end of the date you realize this person isn’t for you, let them know. You might not want to do it right away, because it can be scary. But let them know eventually.

DON’T just block & ignore them or use a rouse you saw on t.v.
DO  respect them as a human and be upfront & honest with them.

In the end someone might be hurt but they can’t fault you for being honest and true to yourself.

All the best,
Bailey B.

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