Browsing Tag

awkward

Dating

Tinder Dates: Part Four.

If you know me you know I’ve gone on some horrible dates.

So naturally I signed up for Tinder. You know, keep the bad dates going and content for the blog.
You can find part one here, part two here, and part three here.

However, some people surprise you and you end up on a fantastic date. Let’s face it, it was bound to happen. They can’t all be bad dates.

My go date activity is a walking coffee. (Get coffee, walk around)

 Two reasons: one I have a serious coffee addiction and two, I like walking around and exploring.

I feel like I need to give you all a bit of back story about this date.

I came across Allan* on tinder and it was his picture that had me go “Holy hell he’s cute, I’m swiping right!” I immediately thought to myself, I should have probably read the words in his profile before swiping right. But lo and behold, it was a match!

*Names have been changed because privacy.

Now you are probably wondering what did this profile picture look like? Well, it was a very adorable picture of Allan and his dog. His dog is super cute, so I may have swiped right for the dog, stayed for the human.

Allan and I got to chatting over Tinder and I realized that he’s a genuine nice guy, so I wanted to meet him. He works in the film Industry so trying to nail down a date with him was a bit hard because his hours and my hours didn’t match up. We agreed that later that afternoon was best and we should do a walking coffee.

Allan and I met up at Starbucks for coffee. The first thing I did upon meeting him was pet the dog. I was very excited about the dog because he’s super adorable. If you look into my Instagram you will find the picture of said adorable dog.

Allan, adorable dog and I ended up walking around a pond near my house. It might be that I’ve been on so many bad dates that when someone asks a question about me and the things I’m interested in, I’m over the moon. I’m not asking all the questions and pulling teeth to get the conversation going.

So with that said we ended up talking for about four hours. Without realizing that four hours  had passed.

We had realized it was getting late when we watched the sunset threw the trees and the street lights coming on.

When I say my life is like a movie, it’s true because sometimes romantic things actually happen.  Let me set the scene.

Sun setting
Scooting closer to each other
Sneaking your arm around the other
Stealing a kiss under the stars
All the while a dog tries to figure out what’s rustling around in the bushes behind you.

I may have romanticized it a bit, but I’m a sucker for sunsets and smooches.

Bonus if they happen at the same time.

We may have proceeded to smooch for a little while longer, and then realized the hour.

My favorite part was not the kiss at sunset but the fact that Allan wanted to walk me home to make sure I got home safe. OK so, maybe from sunset on was my favorite part of the date.

I remember standing at my front gate and saying “I had a great time tonight and I would like to see you again, I’ll message you my number and we will plan for a movie or something”. It’s pretty obvious that Allan got my number, I got a second date and the adorable dog got to go on a few more walks with two humans.

I also happened to end up with to mosquito bites on my feet. So for the next five days, when my feet would itch, I would think of smooches under the stars.

I have one more Tinder date to tell, remember Esteban? Stay tuned for that blog post.

All the best!

Dating

Tinder Dates: Part Three.

If you know me you know I’ve gone on some horrible dates.

So naturally I signed up for Tinder. You know, keep the bad dates going and content for the blog. You can find part one here and part two here.

Everyone goes on a really great dates, and everyone goes on really bad dates.  Although, it seems that I go on a lot of really bad dates more often than really great dates. So I’m here to tell you about my worst Tinder Date and my favorite Tinder date.

My worst Tinder Date.
Is it bad I can’t even remember this guy’s name? For story telling purposes I will call him Alex.

Alex and I had agreed to meet downtown next to the famous Olympic torch after I was off work. I remember walking up to the agreed meeting spot and seeing a very handsome man standing there looking at his watch, looking around and then back at his watch. I remember thinking to myself “Wow, this guy looks better in person!” As I got closer we did that thing where you both look at each other like *are you the one I’m meeting here?* look.  Sadly this man wasn’t Alex, but some other guy waiting for his date to show up.

Although, the guy seated about 30 ft away, wearing dirty sweats and an oversized hoodie, was indeed, Alex.
I walked over and said “Hey, are you by Alex by any chance?” We had our introduction and he apologized for not dressing up for this date because clearly I had, as he just came from work.
Please note we are less than five minutes into this “date” and I was just wearing a skirt, leggings and a sweater and I just came from work as well.

This is the moment I should have walked away.  I didn’t.

I asked him if he wanted to grab coffee and walk around like we had originally agreed on.  Alex responded with “Well I just spent a shit load on parking down here so why don’t we go drive over to Stanley park and walk around their”.
I told him I don’t get into cars with strangers. You know, because safety.

This is the moment I should have walked away. I didn’t.

He told him that he promised to keep his hands to himself on the way over, he was more than willing to let me take a picture of his driver’s license and text it to anyone I knew well.  Needless to say, I took a photo of his drivers license and texted it to a friend. I went against everything my mom taught me as a kid and I got into a car with a stranger.

On the way over Alex told me he worked as a mechanic, he owned 4 vehicles and lived in a sweet pad by himself.
Once we arrived at Stanley Park, he was irritated that he had to pay for parking. You see Alex just spent his last 100$ at Costco on wholesale goods and paying the 3.25$ for parking was just “Fucking bullshit”.

Then the following conversation went down:
Me:  “I have 3.25$, so this means you get me for an hour”
Alex:  “Well who says I’m going to want you after an hour?”

This was the moment I should have walked away, I didn’t.

We began walking and I asked him all kinds of questions about himself. Hobbies, favorite movies, does he have any family in the area? This guy never directly asked me any questions. I would always ask him a question and tack on my answer to my question at the end.

During this walk I found out:
He lives in a sweet pad.
He hates his ex girlfriend with a passion.
He likes to take TV’s apart, fix them, put them back together and sell them.
He took off his shirt and I got to see all his scars from various moments in his life.

These where moments I should have walked away, I didn’t.

During this walk, me asking questions and Alex talking about himself, I began to realize something. He had mentioned he lost his license in the past and the light bulb went off for me. So I asked him, “So, you mentioned you lost your license at one point, like did you lose your wallet with the license inside?”
I was trying to give him the benefit here.

Turns out this guy had lost his license for a DUI, not once, but THREE TIMES in the last 10 YEARS! Then the guy tries to justify as to why he got them!

These where the exact words I used.
“Look I’m going to be honest with you. The fact that you had not one, but three DUI’s in 10 years tells me you don’t respect anyone around you –He tried to interject at this point– No let me finish, I know people who have lost people to drunk drivers and there is no excuse for it. Also on this entire “Date”, you have never asked me a question about myself, which also tells me you have no interest in getting to know me, so this is where I’m going to leave you.”
Alex replied with “But the DUI’s are in my past, you seriously can’t look past that?”
I told him “Yes, the fact that you have three DUI’s is not something I look past, so this is where I leave you, enjoy the parking”.

That is the moment I walked away.

The icing on the cake was the fact that I got a text from him the next morning. The text read “I felt like the date was going really well until you left me in the park. So I understand if you feel bad about wasting my time but I’m willing to give you a second chance.”

Needless to say, I didn’t text him back.

I know to some people this may not seem like the worst Tinder date, but to me its the worst date I’ve ever been on. With that said, I’ve been on some really great dates so I look forward to telling you about my favorite Tinder Date.

Until next time!

Dating

Tinder Dates: Part One.

If you know me you know I’ve gone on some horrible dates.

So naturally I signed up for Tinder. You know, keep the bad dates going and content for the blog.

1st Date:

The first ever Tinder date I went on was with *Esteban. I totally expected this date to be a bad one. Like, awful date, because you know – Tinder.

The first tinder “date” with Esteban, lasted about 6 hours and well I went in expecting it to be an awful date, it turned out to be a great date.

With that said, Esteban deserves to have his own post.

So on to the second date!

2nd Date.

The second tinder date I went on was with a guy named *Billy.  Now, first off the fact that his name was Billy should have been a sure sign that it was going to be at least a bit awkward.
We had agreed to meet up at Starbucks. However, Billy was late and Starbucks was closing. With me on time and the coffee addict I am, I got coffee and waited outside for this guy to show up.
Billy finally shows up and we have an awkward “Hi I’m Bailey, Hi I’m Billy” greeting and I tell him since he was late, Starbucks is now closed.

So we walk into another coffee shop to get him a coffee and wonder about. Inside the coffee shop the following exchange happens.

Billy – Hi, I’ll get a large triple shot iced Americano.
Barista Cool, anything for you lady (referring to me).
Me- *drinking out of a Starbucks cup* Nope, I’m pretty sure I’m all set.

The date with Billy was off to an OK start, although a bit patchy. I asked him what he did for a living and he works in theater lighting. Billy talking about his job was probably the highlight of the date. He clearly enjoys what he does and has a passion for it. But if I’m going to be honest, the date was going pretty well until the topic of politics came up. Turns out he is not a fan of our new PM and then went on about bill C-51.
Over all it was an awkward date. Billy is actually a really cool person . Although not for me, so on to the next.

3rd date.

The third date I went on was with a guy named *Dave.
I left after less than 15 mins.
This is literally what went down after we met up at a coffee shop and said hello. (Remember I’m a coffee addict and if it’s going to be a bad date, I might as well be caffeinated.

Me : “So do you want to sit down and chat or wander about and chat?”
Dave: “Well we could sit, but I have to ask, has any one told you that you have huge tits?”
-He asks this question as we are standing at the bar with coffee in hand-
Me: “Yes they have and if you could move past that this date will last a little bit longer for you.”
Dave: “But they are just so big! Do you fall over all the time?”

I had to put down my coffee at this point because I proceeded to laugh, laugh some more than laughed until I couldn’t breathe. Then I took my coffee and I left.

Let’s be realistic here, if that was the start of the date, it wasn’t going to get any better than that.

I’ve been on a couple more tinder dates since, one was horrible and the other was actually pretty adorable. So I’ll save those two for part two.

*Names have been changed because privacy is cool.

Transit

The Bus part 2.

I take Transit everywhere, it’s how I get around. However, it seems like I’m an open target for crazy when I’m outside by myself.

Flash back to a few years ago, I was waiting for the bus near my house to go to a party.
A very intoxicated man sat on the bus stop across the street, notices me and proceeds to walk across a busy street, without using the cross walk to come over and say “Hi”. Now because this is the bus stop I use all the time, I tend to actually talk to people. It seems like the nice neighborly thing to do. However, I realize this man is very tipsy and is doing a bad job of hitting on me.  He decides where I was going that night, he’s going come too and show me a good time! He managed to say “Screw the crew, I’mmagoin to hang out with youuu!”

All I can think is “where the fuck is the bus?” well keeping a safe distance from this stranger.

I remember telling him that was not necessary and what would his crew think when he didn’t show up to wherever he was going? He seemed very satisfied with that answer and wandered away.

All I could think was “thank the heaven’s he left me alone! But really, where the fuck is the bus!?”

Across the street at the other bus stop going in the other direction, sat a man.

Taking a poo.

I kid you not, pants around ankles, squatting, doing his man business, in a bus shelter.  Now this is not the first time I’ve seen a person taking a poo at a bus stop, Thanks buses going down Hastings, but it is the first time I’ve seen it in my neighborhood.

Fun fact: Same tipsy guy from earlier.

Turns out he needed to poo and didn’t want to be rude and poo next to me. Chivalry at its finest I tell you!

Finally the bus shows up well this guy his doing his thing at the other bus, and I’ve never gotten on a bus so fast in my life. I looked out the window to see the man standing and struggling to put on his pants, yelling at the bus driver to wait. I could have sworn the bus driver said “Fuck that” under his breath as he closed the doors and drove away.

Needless to say I was late to the party but I had a very interesting reason to why!
Now not every transit related story is awful and cringe worthy, like this one.

I got the chance to work the Gluten-Free Expo thing through work with my co-worker Shayla. I was standing outside of Canada place waiting for Shayla to show up when this exchange took place.

A guy walked past me, glances over and trips over his two feet. He then says “Holy fucking shit, beautiful”. He looked super embarrassed as this took place right in front of me, so I said “Good morning” in the nicest

-I-just-saw-all-of-that-but-its-OK-it-was-cute-

kind of way. This guy then walked away, comes back and says “Sorry, I saw you almost tripped and forgot what direction I was going” and left.

So not every time I take the bus I need an adult, but lets face it, I need an adult when I go outside.

Relationships

Fireworks.

It’s no surprise that I’ve been on a countless number of dates. Mostly bad ones, but I’ll be honest with you, I would go on those bad dates again. Going on bad dates has taught me what I liked, what I didn’t and most importantly, what I was looking for in a partner in crime.
It’s also no surprise that I’m in an age where internet dating is a thing. But have you ever go on an awful date and you know instantly it isn’t going to go anywhere? However, you don’t want to come off as a bitch because you realized this in the first 5 mins?

I’ve been there MANY a times.

I had a Facebook friend post this and it showed up on my feed. I instantly replied.

Ugh. Awful date. His pictures made him seem so much more attractive. Now I have to let him down somehow.

I totally get that a picture doesn’t do a person justice, or they only post they only post one type of photo. I also understand that if you aren’t attracted to them, then why waste your time and their time? I feel you need sparks to make some fireworks.This was my response

“I’ll be honest with you, I feel like we aren’t going to work. I don’t feel a spark and I don’t want to waste your time and lead you on. Okay, thanks Bye”.

This was my go to -holy-crap-need-to-run-away-now-but-don’t-want-to-hurt-your-feelings- exit speech.

Yes I had an exit speech. I went on a few dates with guys where it should have ended after the first date, but they seem to be enjoying themselves and I didn’t want to be mean or rude. But by doing that I was leading them on in hopes that these dates would become something. I also was wasting their time, not to mention mine.

On a date where you know it’s not going to go anywhere for you? Be honest with them. I’ll be cliché here, Honesty is the best policy. If they feel like you are being a rude, mean or a bitch because of it, well then great. You dodged a bullet there.
For me dating was awesome (bad dates and all) because I got to understand what I wanted, needed and deserved: Respect.

If you aren’t enjoying yourself on a date, then how can you enjoy a relationship with them? This is a great question, dates are supposed to be fun and you are supposed to enjoy yourself. If by the end of the date you realize this person isn’t for you, let them know. You might not want to do it right away, because it can be scary. But let them know eventually.

DON’T just block & ignore them or use a rouse you saw on t.v.
DO  respect them as a human and be upfront & honest with them.

In the end someone might be hurt but they can’t fault you for being honest and true to yourself.

All the best,
Bailey B.

Relationships

Bad Dates part 2.

As I previously wrote about some of the bad dates I’ve been on, which can be found here. I’ve been reminded of so many more awful dates that I just couldn’t hold back and needed to share.

Have you ever been told you don’t eat enough well on a date? Well I have. Have you ever been to Anton’s pasta bar? Well if you haven’t ever been, you get a plate of pasta which is about the size of a small baby. I had been once before with an old boyfriend, so I was prepared for the sheer size of the plates.
At our scheduled time for my date to pick me up, I got a text which stated “Hey, sorry I’m running late”. When he finally arrived, turns out he lost track of time getting ready. We finally left for Anton’s, and somehow managed to get in before it got too busy*. We get seated, served water and menus. I got the Gnocchi Cardinale and he ended up with Linguine Alla Siciliana. Is it bad that I remember what we ordered but for the life of me, can’t remember his name? Anyway, once the meals where served, we began to enjoy our food and some more small conversation. After about 20 mins, I have eaten so much food, but I’ve only made a small dent in the corner. This is where my date tells me “You know for a girl, you don’t eat enough. You should at least try and enjoy yourself when you are out with me.” Food aside, the conversation wasn’t awful, but it wasn’t like he was actually trying to get to know me. I simply told him “Well, just because the food is in front of me, doesn’t mean I need to eat all of it. I’m getting full and rather than over indulge and feel gross after, I would rather enjoy my food then stuff my face with it.” He had no words for that and we carried on to other topics.
I offered to pay for my part of the bill, he insisted to pay all of it. I wasn’t going to argue, and we left. We ended up going for a walk as it was super nice out and then he drove me home. We reached my house, we have stopped for no more than a few seconds. I was getting ready to leave the car and the conversation went as follows

 “What, after all that you aren’t going to invite me in? Where is my goodnight kiss?”

Note, we are still in the car, I’m holding my leftovers from dinner. I stopped what I was doing and said

“Excuse me?!” Date replied with “Yeah, I paid for dinner, we went for a walk and you aren’t even going to let me inside or kiss me good night!”

Cue angry redhead,

“Well –dates name I don’t remember- If you were a nice guy, you would have walked me to the door instead of trying to kiss me like a 16year old who just got the keys to his car. Secondly, I offered to pay my part, you said no. That doesn’t grant you a free ticket inside, a goodnight kiss maybe, but no entry into my bedroom. Thirdly, for future dates you go on, never comment on how much or how little a women eats at dinner.”

This guy, now realizing the date is over, leans in for a kiss anyway. My reaction was to dump the contents of my dinner in his lap and left the car.

There was also a date I went on when I was newly single in Vancouver, where I agreed to meet a date named Don, at a Starbucks. If I’m meeting someone I don’t know, it’s always in a coffee shop. I knew instantly who he was when I walked in. Don was dressed nicely, but he was also seated with 3 drinks. A coffee, a latte and a tea. He wanted to see which one I would choose and the reason behind it. When I told him I would get my own drink because I’m particular about my drink at Starbucks*. He said got defensive and said “Well it’s not like I drugged any of them or something! I wanted to try a experiment on you!
I stood up, left and didn’t look back.

*Antons gets crazy busy, go early if you want to beat the line
*Grand white mocha with two pumps of raspberry. Very sweet but delicious.

What is your worst or awkward date?

All the best,
Bailey B.

Transit

The Skytrain.

I feel that you should know that I do not drive and as a result public transportation is my best friend when it comes to moving around the city. As I posted last week about my adventures on the bus I have had a few more on the skytrain.

Now, I’m used to being approached by strangers, having obscure conversations with them and having random things said to me. Here are a few of my true stories of taking the skytrain in Vancouver.

This took place on a Sunday morning, waiting for the skytrain at 29th ave. I got approached by a fellow redhead to and I quote “Hook up and keep the race alive among the reds”. I remember telling him it was too early for this shit and walked further down the platform away from him.

Picture Joey from friends and how he says “how you doing?!” in the way that he does. Now picture a creepy old man coming up to you saying that. Now picture me awkwardly walked away from him, hands outstretched and making a cringing face.

You sometimes find yourself standing between two strangers and somehow get caught up in things. This time I was just simply standing in the wrong spot on the train. Cue racist Italian singer belting out some Italian lyrics. How do I know he was racist? Well another passenger speaks Italian and called him out on it. Ensure argument with me in the middle of the two. Oh public transport early in the morning, I enjoy you and I hate you at the same time.

I find that when you take any sort of public transportation you end up seeing the same people week after week around the same time of day. You start to smile at them, work up to a good morning and how are you. This is a normal thing for anyone who isn’t me because I try to stick to my coffee, my newspaper or my phone because it could eventually lead to inappropriate conversations or see some weird things. I swear I’m not being rude, I’m just cautious first thing in the morning.

But sometimes it’s when you are coming home from work and you’ve stopped off at the grocery store. I had kept running into the same guy all over the store and kept smiling in the way you do when this happens to you. This does happen to people other than myself right? Well, who shows up well I’m waiting for the skytrain? None other than grocery man! He too was on his way home. This guy then proceeded to tell me that he could make use of my strawberries tonight if I wanted to follow him home for dinner. I declined and moved away from him.

I wish I could tell you that these are it for my transit adventures but they aren’t. I have many more and I’m sure many more will happen to me at some point.

I hope you got some enjoyment out of them because looking back I do!

All the best,
Bailey B.

Transit

The Bus.

As I posted last Monday about my lovely ride to work let me tell you about past encounters with some lovely transit folk on the bus. As a result of some of these, it’s part of the reason I tend to avoid the bus after dark, or whenever I can when I’m by myself. These have actually happened to me over the last 7 years of Living in Vancouver. I couldn’t make these up if I tried.

One time I was waiting for the 250 horseshoe bay bus to get to Park Royal, where I was working at the time, in downtown Vancouver. Now if you have ever visited downtown Vancouver, you would know its very business dress for a weekday. So it’s about 7:45 in the morning, people are moving about and I’m engrossed in my phone so I’m not paying attention to the world around me. I did notice a guy sit down right next to me on the bench and use the seat to his right for his gym bag. He was wearing blue sweatpants. I think nothing other than “You ass hat, someone else could sit there, does your bag really need that seat?” Not thinking “Why is this guy wearing sweatpants in downtown Vancouver on a weekday?” instead. I went back to my phone, shortly after this man sat down. Not even a minute later this girl came over and said to me “You want to stand over with me”.

Turns out the ass hat had started masturbating right next to me at the bus stop.

Probably the reason he was wearing sweatpants, easy access and cover up. I’m still really grossed out that had happened but so glad I didn’t see anything, thank the holy heavens, and that random girl was there to be my hero.

There was that one time I got told my boobs were offensively large and they should be covered up. Now if you know me, I try to NOT have my ladies hanging out. But the icing on the cake was that this came from a lady not wearing a bra, in a very gross and dirty top that left NOTHING to the imagination.

Then there was that time I was going to take the bus to a friend’s place. Well waiting for my bus to show up I somehow managed to get hit on and see a guy take a poop on a bench. Fun fact: Same guy.

Or there was the time that I got called out for being a devil worshiper because I chose to be a redhead. Being a natural redhead, this happens more often than I like to care for. Although this story is the reason one of my good friends and I have the nicknames Spawn and Witness. But I’ll get into that on another day because that needs to be its own post.

Now mind you this is just what has happened to me on the bus, never mind whats happened on the skytrain.

All the best,
Bailey B.

Relationships

Awkward dates

Every person has a story of a bad date that they have been on. I have been on more than my share of awful, cringe worthy dates.  Let me share you a couple true stories of my life when I was single.

This date took place about 3 years ago? I went on a date with an attractive redhead named Gavin. He seemed like an interesting character with some quirky personality. We decided to meet up for lunch. We ended up meeting up at Cafe Deux Soleils because he’s vegetarian. He’s attractive, outgoing and he loves animals, why is this man single? Well…. we somehow got on the topic of finding “the one” and babies. Yes already on awkward ground as we had been on this date for about 30 mins. Then, he proceeds to drop the following and I look for the nearest exit to go anywhere but that moment.

“You will need to be pure before we start having kids. Like no more drinking, drugs and un-natural foods. Everything you put into your body from now on will be organic so our baby will have a clean and healthy start with their energy”.

It should be noted that I don’t do drugs, but Gavin here was talking about cold and pain medications such as ibuprofen and the like.

The date ended soon after.

I like to believe that everyone goes on at least one super awkward date in their life. Let me tell you about my awkward date with Mike that happened about 2 years ago. He was working as an architectural technologist, so in other words very smart with lines and terms. He was about my height, short blond hair and a retainer. Mike wasn’t my usual type of guy, he was very shy, awkward, didn’t like sports but had a kind smile. We had an alright first date over cheesecake and coffee. Mike was very shy, loved books and old movies, so the first date was a bit slow but other than that quite lovely. The second date started off with Mike taking his retainer out before dinner, which is alright but leaving it on the table in the open, not so much. When dinner was over and walking to the skytrain, I saw the kiss coming miles away. How? Well he said “In order to give you a proper kiss, I need to remove my retainer”.

The date ended very soon after that, without a good night kiss.

I had gone on of dates with some guy who’s name I can’t remember, but I do remember going out for dinner, ending back at my place hanging out on the couch. I don’t remember much of that evening other than feeling super uncomfortable as he tried his hardest to put his moves on me. I should mention that my roommate was home this entire time, so that in itself was awkward. I do however remember him saying the lines “No grapefruits, no grouping” and laughing my ass off in front of him. As to the context of this I can only imagine it had to do with my roommate’s grapefruits on the table and this date wanting to go forth with more than just hanging out on the couch. I also remember hearing my roommate laugh from his room soon after hearing that line and him thinking this guy was an asshole.

Needless to say, the dates didn’t continue after that.

I’ve been on many, many first dates, some great, most not so great, some awful. I learned through dating that to find a prince you have to kiss a few frogs or throw pasta in their face. Now that’s one of my favorite memories from dating, but that’s for another time!

All the best,
Bailey B.